thinking of u

suddenly i'm thinking of him again!
oh no why am i so emo at the night eh?

actually few days back i've post a status on twitter saying: you've brighten up my day!

story is not him or neither anyone brighten me up that morning, it's just i got compliment by my boss saying that i've done a good job, client like the design very much and it's a big project i can say, so i guess this is the biggest account that company have for the year! and i'm proud that the project that handled by myself finally got some rewards, my work being appreciated! that's why i'm so happy about, whole day was in a very good mood.. not until in the evening..

when i realized something unexpected, he removed me from his facebook account, and i guess i've also been block in his msn list -.-" it turned me real down.. i know it's not a big deal or what, just feel that it kinda disappointed.. and what's wrong with me? why am i still thinking of him when he doesnt really care about it :( i'm sad.. i still cant overcome my feeling towards him.. while checking some msg in my phone today, i looked back on his msg again, yea i still keeping those msg in my phone, just a few which i didnt delete it last time, and it makes me sad again, recall back the past few months it was a really sweet memory for me..

perhaps this round i need to put it all down completely, i dont know how to react when i heard the rumors still going on, and that's kinda funny.. well i'm now just guessing and thinking too much again.. couldnt help but just my imagination is more than what i've expect.. i couldnt lie that i still care and think about him.. i'm just so silly! i've been cheated by believing miracles!

i dont want to be so strong afterall, i need to be pampered eh! relationship is the most difficult game that i've played, and i'm failed.. for the 1st time i've put my career behind the relationship.. i'm tired on my career ady and i need some sparkles in my life!