sick

down with sick again,
2nd time in a month, bravo!

at first was having serious flu last week for 3 days,
then yest n today having high fever n sorethroat!

damn all kind of sick come in 1 shot,
felt like wasting time lying on the bed only.
and i still have damn lot of works to do!
blargh!

2am

am still up for work now :(

suffering from all the stress i had, and making myself looks like shit now.. haih.. i dont know what can i do now except work work and work non stop, even go out i cant really relax and enjoy! i think this round i really need a break, a real break!

cheered up by chai just now, actually he did made my day :) i wan to see it in real person! lol

and even went to mv for camera survey with philip, having a nice chat and dinner with him, but when back to work the mood totally changed. i just couldnt take so many stress! too many things bother me now until i cant take any more move, just can say work harder and harder, taking life to another stage and also trying not to push myself so hard.

few days back have a nice chat with khang (in a very wrong place also!) make me feel so much better, at least ppl around me care about me. :) i really need to catch up with all my old friends!

and for my situation, i dont really like to beg people for help, i need supports, someone could really understand my situation and mentally helping me.. really thanks to my apek cousin who always listen to me.. he he.. and giving me alot of advice which is good for me.

another busy week ahead, finger crossed that i can survive and done all my works! and i hope my hardwork really get paid off! that's a simple request i needed for the time being. i just need to be pampered!

life sucks, hating it alot. how can i change it?

oh well, i officially categorize this page as emo blog from now on! either hates it or love it. this is just my 'ordinary' life which full of shocking challenges!

i wanna scream my lungs out!

urghhhhhhhhhhhh

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

damn damn stress, i just wanted to shout out or cry out again!

please dont rush me anymore, everything must follow the queue, all tight deadlines, damn it!

ok feel so good after shouting thru text -.-"

actually i should be blogging about all my happy stuff! i have so many things to share! no time to edit pics yet, guess i think it'll just drag till no way.. hm..

and i've been drinking alot of wine lately, my addiction is back now.. hoho.. last time i was wine addict, everytime been drinking at friend's house! eekkss, should control my drinking, cant always be drinking non stop!

alrite back to work.. boooo!

2.1.2010

not to late to wish everyone happy new year!

spanking new year ahead, festive season mood already gone and now is the 2010, time flies so fast, hardly taking a deep breathe to slow down. time is so precious!

i'm loving december but hating january.

december is the festive month where thr's lots of holidays, which means got excuses for nice meals & party down town, been having xmas lunch, dinner, bbq & drinking session, get closer with all the colleagues, friends n family, and also pampered myself by buying an expensive bag (again!) then off to new year dinner & countdown, but starting on 1.1.2010 already woke up early for work and work.

*for the picture viewing me lasy to upload it here, just goto my facebook to view XD

**and for my status update just follow me at twitter.. lol.. abandoned my blog ady.

actually now i should continue my work but i'm just not into the mood, whole body aching and lack of sleeps. and also been emo for the pass few days, i dont know why the bad luck is still sticking me, wont let me have a normal life as i wish to, just cant let go on the things that i've been struggling now. feel so bad!

the whole thing for this blog post aso kinda emo, i cant control my feelings when the bad things happened on me, and i've cried again for once when the situation is so damn bad and the feeling is so sucky! i told myself to be strong but i just couldnt hold my tears, it automatic dropped down. worst thing just pushing me very hard and i cant stand it. haih.

felt so stupid and silly for once again. in everything: career, family, friends and relationship, all damn complicated game that needed alot of efforts to play and move on. the most difficult game is the relationship part, just couldnt guess what will happened next or how the feel had totally changed. miss all the things that he had done for me and what we've been, the sweetest time is always too short, only left memory in my heart. surprises makes me happy :) yet coolness makes me upset :(

miracles oh miracles! i'm still believing it no matter how bad is the situation. i know i'm damn lucky and too greedy to ask for more, but for just once i'm hoping miracles happen on me, everything goes well and hard work pays off!

time for some sleep, if not turned into zombie again.

work just drag till tomorrow, it's still holiday wei!

old & new me

time flies. it's the last month of the year 2009.

still the same old me, but i need to be a new me for next year, which is just a few weeks later..

same thing like last time, i'll list down what i've archived for this year and the resolution for the brand new year :)

in year 2009

jan

cny month, eating n visiting friends non-stop, glad i meet back my primary & secondary school mates, and of coz angpao money this year is damn alot :p

feb

meeting back my ex-colleagues and farewell for my colleague :(

mar

spending a lot of precious time with families :)

apr

is my bday month! lot of celebration & surprises! unexpected.. he he.. and went for a short roadtrip..

may

crazy month, outings non-stop from partying to roadtrips, and it was the most sweetest month for me but it ended too fast :( too complicated for us..

oh 1st time ever attended malay's wedding dinner

june

due to the down-ess of my emotions, crying non-stop, more outings and starting renovations for the new eden

jul

still damn sad and emo, and grandma starting to get weak day by day.. had a stupid fight with bff until cold war.. and i've also made my biggest purchase in my life, booked a car!

aug

got my new car and got scratched for the 1st time -.-" and went for roadtrip again to PD for 2 days in a row -.-"

sep

more n more outings & roadtrips -.-" seems like continuous non-stop.. and partying too -.-" damn pk for this month.. 1st week of holidays-1st day clubbing, 2nd day drove to melacca, 3rd day movie, 2 days later clubbing again.. 2nd week of holidays-roadtrip to melacca again, then drinking session the next day, 2nd day drinking again (conned night!) then 3rd day drinking again! worst on 3rd day and i cant forgive myself for being so drunk and spoiled the whole date :( my fault after a nice n romantic dinner plus movies but i spoiled the night.. damn, i'm so regret and feel so guilty.. i thought the 2nd chance is here but i just spoiled it :( i was so upset and go out to drink again on the weekends -.-" 2 days in a row again! oh and i made another purchase-iphone!

oct

very happening again, meet up with ex-colleagues & her frens, cousin's 21st birthday, bachelor's night, birthday celebrations, yamcha n outings with s6-ians, roadtrip to PD again and collected my iPhone, and eden gallery changed name to eden bridals

nov

officially wed is the movie day, drinking session again and again, and oh went to sing k! booked hk's hotel & air tix to bali & ho chi minh, crazy planning for next year!

dec

be a videographer for actual day wedding and got alot of surprises from a friend :)

(soon to be add in more)

phew! there's alot of things happened in just a year, without noticing it.. glad that i went thru all the hard times, learned alot of new things and also start planning for my future :p

well guess this year was the most hectic year for me, and i cant believe that now i'm owning a new car and a new phone, all paid by my self!

ok here's the list of my resolution for the year of 2010:

- sayang my body and take good care of my health (that's a must!)

- target earn 80k next year

- car & phone got it ady, must maintain

- start saving more, target 1k per month

- invest on housing, guess it's time to start planning to buy a new house for myself!

- more trips & gateway!

- changing to a new working environment (well, every year i did say the same thing but i still stick with my current company -.-")

- be more brave to myself, do not shy to ask! (which i'm coz i know i'm so introvert!)

- start gym or yoga! need diet! i need to slim down!

- more shopping to pamper myself more :p

- more time for families & old friends

- get a bf! lol i'm serious!

- get more books to read.. been stopping buying books recently -.-"

well i guess i wont want to expect more from the list above, sometimes life's interesting when you have a lot of surprises and unexpected things that happened around you, as i'm enjoying every moment in my life now!

time to forget all the bad things that happened on me and start thinking positive, it's the end of the year ady and need to kick start another brand new year ahead! i've always wanted to have a happy ending of each and everything but life is unfair, and there's always challenge ahead. i hope i'm still strong enough, as i've been in bad luck for 2 years, and i'm used to it, sick of it actually. so i need to work harder for myself and help others if i've the ability.

hope next year will be a brighter year for me! *finger crossed*